MARRIAGE

-You have two choices in life:
You can stay single and be miserable,
or get married and wish you were dead.
-At a cocktail party, one woman said to another,
"Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?""Yes, I am. I married the wrong man."
-A lady inserted an ad in the classifieds:
"Husband Wanted".Next day she received a hundred letters.
They all said the same thing:
"You can have mine."
-When a woman steals your husband, there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.

-A woman is incomplete until she is married. Then she is finished
-A little boy asked his father,
"Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"
Father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying"

-A young son asked,
"Is it true Dad, that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?"Dad replied, "That happens in every country, son."
-Then there was a woman who said,
"I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, and by then, it was too late."
-Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
-If you want your spouse to listen and
pay strict attention to every word you say -- talk in your sleep.

-Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking th ey had no faults at all.
-First guy says, "My wife's an angel!"Second guy remarks, "You're lucky, mine's still alive."